R.I.P. Zorro

R.I.P. Zorro

SWH: Week 6 (thirty)

Frostbiter: Wrath of the Wendigo (trailer)
The Shining (fake trailer)
The Simpsons: "Treehouse of Horror 05-1: The Shinning" (1994)

Tales from the Crypt: "Dead Wait" (1991)
Guinan, no! (7/10)
d. Tobe Hooper

Rock 'n' Roll Nightmare (1987)
The Intercessor vs. Beelzebub was the awesomest thing I've seen in a very long time. (8/10)
d. John Fasano

Igor and the Lunatics (trailer)
Bride of Frankenstein (trailer)
Looney Tunes: "Water, Water Every Hare" (1952)

Masters of Horror: "Sick Girl" (2005)
Kind of a lesbian version of The Fly, but fun and better than May. (7/10)
d. Lucky McKee

Chopper Chicks in Zombietown (trailer)
Zombi 3 (trailer)
Happy Tree Friends: "Remains to be Seen" (2004)

Zombi 2 (1979)
It's hard not to appreciate a flick that has a zombie wrestling a shark. (7/10)
d. Lucio Fulci

Watched with C and chowed on some Pizza House. By the time Zombi 2 arrived, he was out for the count. I made sure to clap my hands really loudly so that he woke up to see the shark and eyeball scenes. Employed the inflatable pumpkin cooler for the first time, which held beer and Dr Pepper quite nicely. Sweet Halloween cuppin' cakes were also enjoyed:

SWH: Week 6 (twenty-nine)

Tales from the Crypt: "Abra Cadaver" (1991)
The interior monologue was a little hard to take seriously. (7/10)
d. Stephen Hopkins

Tales from the Crypt: "Top Billing" (1991)
John Astin ensures this is a lot of fun. (7/10)
d. Todd Holland

Zombie: Dawn of the Dead (1978)
Same zombie goodness in a slightly different edit, though I'm not a fan of the new music. (8/10)
d. George A. Romero
[watched whilst wearing a DotD T-shirt, dork that I am.]

SWH: Week 6 (twenty-eight)

Halloween Returns to Haddonfield 25th Anniversary Convention (2003)
The Fans of Halloween (2003)
Halloween 9 Contest Drawing (2003)
Halloween: Michael Myers Panel Discussion at the H25 Convention (2003)
Halloween: Director of Photography Panel Discussion at the H25 Convention (2003)
Halloween: Producer Panel Discussion at the H25 Convention (2003)
Viscious Disorder: "Pure Evil" (2003)
Halloween Interviews (2003)

Halloween: 25 Years of Terror (2006)
Especially amazing that it was put together by fans, this covers the good and bad of the eight movies and the franchise quite well. (7/10)
d. Stefan Hutchinson

SWH: Week 6 (twenty-seven)

Halloween: Resurrection (2002)
All you need to know: a rapper-actor zaps Mike in the sack with a live wire. (4/10)
d. Rick Rosenthal

Halloween: Resurrection: WebCam Special (2002)
The lipstick cam idea was interesting; too bad about the awful script. (5/10)
d. Rick Rosenthal

Deleted Scenes (2002)
Alternate Endings (2002)
Storyboard Comparisons (2002)
Tour of Set with Production Designer (2002)
On the Set with Jamie Lee Curtis (2002)
Head Cam Featurette (2002)

SWH: Week 5 (twenty-six)

Halloween H20: 20 Years Later (1998)
This would've been a great place to let Mike simply R.I.P. (7/10)
d. Steve Miner

Halloween H20: Unmasking the Horror (1998)
Half of this documentary is just effusive praising of the original (5/10)
d. ??

Creed: "What's This Life For" (1998)

SWH: Week 5 (twenty-five)

Mystery Science Theater 3000: "Attack of the the Eye Creatures" (1992)
[A Year on the Satellite of Love] (7/10)
d. Joel Hodgson & Larry Buchanan

Masters of Horror: "Deer Woman" (2005)
Wretched writing with terrible acting except for Benben, but I like everything about the Deer Woman herself. (5/10)
d. John Landis
[I feel guilty about owning this (for my MoH collection only) and An American Werewolf in London. I'm glad I'm not a Blues Brothers or Animal House fan so I'm not tempted to sully my DVD shelves with any more of this guy's stuff. I've read this. Still need to read this.]

The Munsters: "Come Back, Little Googie" (1965)
Mumy's a monkey! (6/10)
d. Joseph Pevney

The Munsters: "Far Out Munsters" (1965)
The Munsters hang with a bunch of beatniks and hippies and Lily proves she has quite a set of pipes. (8/10)
d. Joseph Pevney

The Munsters: "Munsters on the Move" (1965)
The Munsters tackle the lingering hurt from the eminent domain-fueled construction of the expressway system in their own way. (6/10)
d. Joseph Pevney

MST3K (418)

418 - Attack of the the Eye Creatures - This movie was great. The "they just didn't care" parts were incredibly entertaining. I couldn't believe it when the the extra eye creatures starting appearing dressed only in black bodysocks. The day-night mix-ups were pretty standard for this type of film and it seems like a number of recent experiments have had this problem. Considering the rather large plot point on how to dispatch these creatures in this particular picture, the day-is-night shooting was one of the funnier budget-saving flubs I've seen in a film.

Hmm, another host segment dedicated to some random actor who resembles a character in the movie. Never heard of this Earl Holliman guy. I gather he was on the writers' minds because of the series of commercials that preceded the short-lived sitcom Delta, not that that helps any of us non-Holliman fans nowadays. Of course, the power of the writers' fetish for some '70s show called Police Women was also a factor, as they've mentioned that program in the past as well.

The "Eye Creature Accessories" host segment was fun. We got about a month's worth of invention exchanges in there. I think my favorite item was the giant, multi-armed mascara. The thought of the the Eye Creatures trying to apply makeup to their lashes is amusing on its own. And, unlike the preceding segment, it doesn't matter whether you know who Rip Taylor is; the guys are just acting goofy.

I wonder if Larry Buchanan has ever seen his portrayal in the final host segment of this episode? If so, I bet he joined Sandy Frank's MST fanclub.

"That night. The next morning. Sometime that evening." (7/10)

film d. Larry Buchanan (1965)
mst d. Joel Hodgson (5 Dec 1992)

SWH: Week 5 (twenty-four)

Tales from the Crypt: "Loved to Death" (1991)
If it's not mannequin lady trouble, it's nutso love-potion-poisioned lady trouble for poor Andrew McCarthy. (7/10)
d. Tom Mankiewicz

Tales from the Crypt: "Carrion Death" (1991)
A great one-and-a-half man show, if you ignore the fact that he carried a corpse for 6 miles before figuring out that he could cut off its hand. (7/10)
d. Steven E. de Souza

Tales from the Crypt: "The Trap" (1991)
Getting a guy convicted for killing himself for his own insurance money is classic. (8/10)
d. Michael J. Fox

SWH: Week 5 (twenty-three)

The Munsters: "Follow That Munster" (1965)
Ah, Herman, why the racist Asian charicature? (5/10)
d. Joseph Pevney

Tales from the Crypt: "My Brother's Keeper" (1990)
Not as crazy or as funny as it could've been. (5/10)
d. Peter S. Seaman

Tales from the Crypt: "The Secret" (1990)
Even in 1990, day-for-night shots looked like hell. (6/10)
d. Michael Riva

Tales from the Crypt: Season II Shockumentary (2005)
Much more informative than last season's featurette. (6/10)
d. Eric Matthies

The Munsters: "Love Locked Out" (1965)
It really doesn't take much to piss Lily off lately. (6/10)
d. Charles T. Barton

[Watched 100 miles north of homebase at Mom's house]

SWH: Week 5 (twenty-two)

Young Frankenstein (trailer)
Man with the Screaming Brain (trailer)
Aqua Teen Hunger Force: "Broodwich" (2003)

Dust Devil: Final Cut (1992)
As if Argento and Leone met and had a bastard child. (7/10)
d. Richard Stanley

Dracula: Prince of Darkness (trailer)
Sexy Adventures of Van Helsing (trailer)
The Simpsons: "Treehouse of Horror 04-3: Bart Simpson's Dracula" (1993)

Masters of Horror: "Chocolate" (2005)
Some nice bits, but overall too goofy for my tastes. (6/10)
d. Mick Garris

Tales from the Crypt: "Television Terror" (1990)
One of a long line of trash TV host parodies. (6/10)
d. Charles Picerni

Gave Jones Soda Candy Corn a try this week. It was every bit as unimbibable as I remembered. Pop is pretty much carbonated corn syrup in the first place. Candy corn is solidified corn syrup. Mix the two together and you've got Jones' special teeth-rot concoction #9. Strangely, I found it more drinkable if I first ate some leftover Good & Plenty.

Watched with C again. He began to doze even as the first movie rolled. I again had to explain that, while he was asleep, the Dust Devil arrived in a UFO with a bumper sticker on the back reading "I'd rather be in Wolf Creek."

The Dead Boys guard the DVD collection:

SWH: Week 4 (twenty-one)

Halloween: The Curse of Michael Myers (1995)
It starts off as an OK slasher, but devolves into an awful, awful mess by the end credits. (5/10)
d. Joe Chappelle

Halloween 6: The Curse of Michael Myers: Producer's Cut (1995)
The story makes much more sense and the music is far better, but the Thorn motivation for Mike is still not what I prefer. (6/10)
d. Joe Chappelle

Behind the Scenes: Special Effects (1995)
Halloween: The Curse of Michael Myers Promotional Featurette (1995)
Entertainment Tonight: Halloween: The Curse of Michael Myers (1995)
Halloween: The Curse of Michael Myers Panel Discussion at the H25 Convention (2003)

SWH: Week 4 (twenty)

Mystery Science Theater 3000: "Tormented" (1992)
[A Year on the Satellite of Love] (7/10)
d. Kevin Murphy & Bert I. Gordon

The Munsters: "Dance With Me, Herman" (1965)
Did Don Rickles ever look young? (7/10)
d. Joseph Pevney

MST3K (414)

414 - Tormented - I am generally against this remake kick that Hollywood is on, but I think this flick could be really cool if it were amped up with modern FX and sensibilities. The ghost FX are already pretty good for the era. The apparition of Liz was appropriately see-through and had a gown that flapped around in a spooky ghost-wind. Throw in a couple of shots of her doing the "Librarian from Ghostbusters" thing and it's gold. Similarly, the wedding scene -- where the flowers wilt sequentially as the invisible ghost walks up the aisle -- was nice. It'd be better with, maybe, some digital, Silent Hill-style wilting of the entire room. That'd be neat.

Milkman: "Five thou" Joel: "'sand dollars." Once again, I have no complaints about the riffing. The guys are really on a roll now. The MST3K machine is well-oiled and humming along the tracks at a steady pace. I suppose four years of practice will get you to that point. There haven't been any gut-busters like my beloved 303 yet, but season four has been solid as a rock so far. "Wait a minute. Were you just walking on all fours?"

I thought that the repeated "Sessions Presents" compilation CD parody riffs might start to get old, but they didn't. They were all very well-timed, fast paced, and perfectly performed. There were a lot of long shots of the beach that lingered for too long; something had to be done with them all. It was fun to hear the guys constantly taking turns singing one line from a song.

After four years, Jim Mallon temporarily retires from the director's chair with this episode. Maybe he wanted more time to concentrate on the development of Gypsy? At any rate, I could barely detect any difference in the host segments. I did especially like the finally segment. In that one, JatB sing a completely goofy, cheerful song to shake the lingering bummer feeling the movie left. You can't go wrong with a goofy song on this show.

"Seems like a really nice guy. Just wish he wasn't blackmailing me." (7/10)

film d. Bert I. Gordon (1960)
mst d. Kevin Murphy (26 Sep 1992)

SWH: Week 4 (nineteen)

Interview with the Vampire (trailer)
Frailty (trailer)
The Devil's Ball (1934)

Near Dark (1987)
Excellent acting, music, story and action meet to create my favorite vampire movie. (9/10)
d. Kathryn Bigelow

Masters of Horror: "Incident On and Off a Mountain Road" (2005)
This is the Lansdale I know, though I didn't know Coscarelli had this much slasher in him. (8/10)
d. Don Coscarelli

Parts of the Family (trailer)
Werewolves on Wheels (trailer)
The Simpsons: "Treehouse of Horror 07-3: Citizen Kang" (1996)

Wolf Creek (2004)
Been there in 1974, done that in Texas. (6/10)
d. Greg McLean

Inhumanoids: "Cult of Darkness" (1986)
Musings on teen bullying, peer pressure, cults, and the ethics of zombie dating make for a deep show. (8/10)
d. Ray Lee

Gave Jones Soda Berried Alive a try this week. An unsophisticated version of Faygo Red Pop, but of a vaguely blueberry persuasion. Again, not bad. I seem to remember being sickened a lot more by last year's flavors. Then again, I haven't gotten to Candy Corn yet.

Watched the movies with C. He fell asleep in the middle of Wolf Creek and only woke up when the screaming started. Afterwards, he wanted to know what happened prior to all of the noise. I explained that a giant UFO came out of the sky, scooped everyone up and beamed them onto the crazy guy's property.

Mr. Boo guards the hallway, as he is wont:

SWH: Week 4 (eighteen)

Friday the 13th Part V: A New Beginning (1985)
Fake Jason doesn't bother me, I love the goofy characters, but the censored gore is annoying. (6/10)
d. Danny Steinmann
[movie number 600]

The Munsters: "Don't Bank on Herman" (1965)
Herman walks off with the modern equivalent of $109,000. (7/10)
d. Ezra Stone

Inhumanoids: "The Surma Plan" (1986)
You know it's messed up when even D. Compose gets freaked out over one of his zombies. (7/10)
d. Ray Lee

Tales from the Crypt: "Mute Witness to Murder" (1990)
Mostly crap, except for the good Richard Thomas performance. (5/10)
d. Jim Simpson

SWH: Week 4 (seventeen)

The Munsters: "Bats of a Feather" (1965)
Not exactly flattering to NASA with the goofy scientists trying to send bats into space and all. (6/10)
d. Jerry Paris

Inhumanoids: "Cypheroid" (1986)
The schizophrenic nature of this era's cartoons never fails to dizzy. (6/10)
d. Ray Lee

SWH: Week 4 (sixteen)

Halloween 5: The Revenge of Michael Myers (1989)
Showing Mike crying makes this movie deserve a much lower rating, but I'm a sucker for slasher scenes set at farms. (6/10)
d. Dominique Othenin-Girard

Halloween 5: The Revenge of Michael Myers: On-Set Footage (1989)
Halloween: Ellie Cornell Panel Discussion at the H25 Convention (2003)
Halloween 4 & 5 Cast Panel at the H25 Convention (2003)

Inside Halloween 5 (2000)
Some good bits, but the 2003 cast panels were better. (6/10)
d. Mark Cerulli

The Munsters: "Eddie's Nickname" (1965)
I wonder if soup would dissolve my beard too? (7/10)
d. Joseph Pevney

SWH: Week 3 (fifteen)

Halloween 4: The Return of Michael Myers (1988)
Solid slasher sequel, though I can't help but think that Myers looks a lot like Lt. Commander Data. (7/10)
d. Dwight H. Little

Halloween 4: Final Cut (2001)
Probably about the best you can hope for in a documentary about a third sequel. (6/10)
d. Mark Cerulli

I started the night watching Spike TV's Scream Awards 2006. "Unlike the boring Oscars, it has movies I've actually seen," I thought to myself. Indeed, the award for "Most Memorable Mutilation" was impressive, given that Spike didn't censor the gore at all. On the other hand, it's a frigging awards show: dumbasses reading idiotic lines from teleprompters and other dumbasses thanking the people/deities who made their award possible. I shut it off after the crappy band came on. I miss the Horror Hall of Fame.

SWH: Week 3 (fourteen)

The Lost Tape: Andy's Terrifying Last Days Revealed (2004)
Decent acting, but unnecessary. (6/10)
d. Scott Devine & Constantine Nasr

Special Report: We Interrupt This Program! (2004)
You have the zombie plague spreading in the middle of Lake Huron, you morons. (5/10)
d. Scott Devine & Constantine Nasr

Mystery Science Theater 3000: "The Indestructible Man" (1992)
[A Year on the Satellite of Love] (6/10)
d. Jim Mallon & B. Reeves Eason & Joseph Kane & Jack Pollexfen

The Munsters: "All Star Munster" (1965)
Frankenstein playing basketball and the most offense redneck stereotypes you've ever seen. (7/10)
d. Earl Bellamy

The Munsters: "If a Martian Answers, Hang Up" (1965)
It would make sense that Dracula thinks it's his patriotic duty to report UFO sightings to the government. (7/10)
d. Norman Abbott