27 August 2008

TTT: Dead Dudes in the House (1988)

This is one of those "time remaining" bad movies. The only distraction I had from this mind-numbing movie was to continually push the display button on the remote to see how many more minutes of torture I had left. The movie spends its hour and a half following six friends who are trying to fix up an old house (and, contrary to the title, there are two dudettes included). Upon arriving, the first thing one character does is smash a gravestone in the front yard with a pipe. This being a horror movie, you can sense that this was a huge mistake. Long-story-short, the ghost of the old lady that lived there manages to off every single one of the kids, plus two more than wander in latter. Helpfully, any kids that dies immediately comes back to life and helps her kill more kids.

That all sound fine but, sadly, there's a whole lot of nothing in-between the fun of the killings. There are minutes upon minutes of people trying to open doors. Literally, there's a ten minute scene at the beginning of the movie where the characters try to open a door in the house (the old lady having magically trapped them in there). Not long after that, some of the kids get trapped in a room... and spend minutes banging on the door trying to get out. And, as is obligatory in a horror movie, there is time spent with kids pushing against a door, trying to keep a monster out. Lots and lots of door action. If you like doors, you'll love this movie.

Even worse, only a few of the deaths are worth watching. The window with with broken glass that chews a guy in half (really chews: up and down many times) was the highlight. Unfortunately, it also killed the film's only interesting character, the jerk who broke the tombstone. Many of the other deaths are off-screen or just not fun. Bottom line: there just isn't enough good stuff here to justify the bad stuff.

aka The Dead Come Home
aka The House on Tombstone Hill
aka The Road
d. James Riffel