02 August 2008

TTT: Evil Clutch (1988)

Not unlike Nightmare Weekend, this is one of those schizo bad movies. This one's a Fulci-esque flick from Italy. I don't know why, but Italians seem to make more crazy horror movies than any other country on the planet. Maybe it's just a cultural difference? Maybe insane Italian horror movies actually make perfect sense to the natives?

In Evil Clutch, an American woman vacationing in Venice falls in love with a local and decides to go on trip to the Alps with him. They run into a woman who says she was attacked -- but she's really a vampire/witch/something -- and they give her a ride into town. There they meet a crazy guy on a motorcycle who speaks using a electrolarynx. They hike into the mountains and run into both of these people again up there. And there's a zombie chasing them for some reason. And spilling cocaine into a bucket of ooze really makes the ooze happy. And the zombie uses a fishing pole to catch a person. And the titular "evil clutch" is -- I shit you not -- a giant claw that comes out of the vampire/witch's crotch to rip the wieners off of men. Here, here it is:

I've also never see a zombie with such an entertaining personality as the one in this movie. He's one of those fast zombies -- which are not an invention of 28 Days Later or the Dawn remake -- and he's just so into his job of chasing and killing living people, you can't help but cheer for the guy.

It had a slow start, but it turns into great fun by the end.

aka Il Bosco
aka Horror Queen
d. Andreas Marfori